Thoughts on turning 40


[[posterous-content:pid___0]]My mother, Bonnie, holding me as an infant.


In two days I will turn forty. It’s funny, thinking about how old I used to think forty was. I don’t feel like I am coming up on the end of anything, nor like I am in the middle of something. I feel like I am finally starting.

A few years ago I was frustrated at where I was in life. I mapped out my life events on a timeline and realized almost everything major that had happened in my life had happened to me, not because of me. These things ranged from tragedy to good fortune, but they were externalities, and so I had lived my life reacting instead of acting. In hindsight, these things have forced me to develop some important skills based on the talents I have, but a skill developed in hasty reaction is like child labor, it gets the work done in violation of principle.

I decided that was not the model I would choose to follow any longer and, thankfully one thing that happened on purpose was marrying Tinakay, my wife was willing to see the shift happen. I decided to do what I am.

In all of the variables of my life as long as I can remember there has been one constant in my life: art.

A thief isn’t a thief because he steals; he steals because he is a thief. In the same way, we are not artists because we create art. It is in us and compels us, but we spend so much time doing what life demands, that we can’t respond to the art inside us demanding life.

I have the spent the last two years prepping the canvas so Life, get ready to look like what’s in my head.

If you had planned on giving me a gift (as if I should presume) I would appreciate nothing more than a small donation (or a large one if you are inclined) to one of many of the ways I am going to work on bringing art to life. Here’s the link:




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